Well it’s that time of the year again. The equinox has arrived, witches are brewing their potions, druids are prancing around the stones ,occultists everywhere are gazing at their crystals and the annual F1 silly season is in full swing. Except that this year it is on overdrive. With turbos and superchargers on full song. Going into the summer break everything seemed to be quietly settled for another bout of steady conservatism. And then four days later Danny Boy threw a sizable spanner into everyone’s works.


  With all the details worked out to Ricciardo’s precise requirements regarding money, length of contract, non-race activities etc he phones Mr Horner out of the blue and says I am going to Renault. Horner thinks this is Danny pulling his finger (or some other part of his anatomy) but gradually realises he is serious. This deal then buggers up the plans of both Carlos Sainz and Esteban Ocon who were both angling for the second Renault seat. Ocon’s position got a lot worse a few weeks later when Lance Stroll’s daddy bought Force India from the administrators. Daddy would have been unlikely to stump up the necessary readies to buy the team unless he was going to plonk his pride and joy into one of the seats next year. Or even this year. As Sergio Perez had already signed a contract for 2019 and brings muchos pesos it became pretty obvious that Esteban needed to find somewhere else to park his extremely talented tushy. King Fernando then gives these chaps a lifeline by deciding that, as he had decided a few months ago, he couldn’t be arsed trolling around at the back for another year and that at least one year in Indycars and another crack at the 500 would be much more fun. And it appears that McLaren are happy to pay him to do just that. So fun and dosh, doesn’t get much better than that.


  Perhaps Carlos would go back to Red Bull and reignite his (not so) happy relationship with Mad Max. Nope, the afore mentioned Mr Horner announces that Pierre Gasly will step up from reserve grade to the top team and Carlos’s contract says he ain’t goin back to Toro Rosso. King Fernando seems to have put in a good word and bingo, Carlos is confirmed with McLaren. So Stroll is off to Racing Point Force India, but when? Will that take place this year and leave Esteban sitting on his thumb? If he does, will Robert Kubica realize that fairy-tale and get a race drive with Williams this year? Will he get a promotion for next year? Will he get screwed over by another rookie with wads of cash/Roubles? It has been suggested that GP2/F2 stalwart Artem Markelov might be able to pinch that ride but will Markelov’s and Sirotkin’s Russian sponsors clash and force one of them out of the team as well? Ocon’s week gets worse when both McLaren and Toro Rosso say that they would not employ him while he still holds a Mercedes development contract and the view is that with Williams loosing their Martini sponsorship, they will need way more cash than Mercedes is willing to spend to buy Ocon that drive. This sorta sucks as Ocon is one of those guys that everyone expects to be World Champion one day. But seemingly not one day soon.


  A bit like Charles Leclerc. He is going to Ferrari. Ferrari boss dies and Leclerc is staying at Sauber as the new Ferrari boss is a mate of Kimi’s and Kimi is having a pretty good year actually. Or perhaps they will honour the old boss’s desire after all. So if Charles does go to Ferrari, what does Kimi do? Back to Sauber has been suggested, but what does that then do to Antonio Giovinazzi’s prospects. Ferrari only gets to place one driver at Sauber and Ericsson’s sponsors own the team so…….Maybe McLaren could rehire Kimi and get him to join King Fernando in their Indycar team. That’d actually be pretty cool, what about it Zak? And back to McLaren. Norris gets an FP1 session at Spa and impresses while Vandoorne has another shocker of a weekend. Even King Fernando says this is not his fault and that he is actually driving very well but just being let down by his machinery. As McLaren then decide to change his chassis, he may well be right. But then just after Monza Norris is confirmed as the number two to Sainz as if McLaren did not place him in some F1 seat next year they would have lost their contractual hold on him and they consider at this point that he is a better long term option that Vandoorne. Who was their better long term option over Kevin Magnussen just 18 short months ago. Not that I am against Lando but lets hope Stoffel can prove them wrong. He has such huge talent and being thrown into the trash bin so early is one of those things that shows just what is wrong with F1 these days. A bit like Ocon really.


  Sam Snape






  Of course just a few days after writing this came the news that Charles Leclerc is in fact heading to Ferrari and Kimi to Sauber in a straight swap. That would seem to leave Giovinazzi squatting in the merde. Unless it was Marcus’s backers that wanted Kimi and then……Still it buggers my idea for a McLaren super-team in Indycars. Oh well.






Oh Danny Boy - Ricciardo celebrates his Monaco winRicciardo nursed his wounded Red Bull to winPower sprays the milk - even on the Indy QueenPower Penske what else do you need?  An odd historical factoid was set on Sunday May 27 2018. Until this date no drivers from the same nation had won both the Monaco Grand Prix and the Indianapolis 500 on the same day. Yes it has occurred on a few occasions that one nations drivers had won these races in the same year, Emerson Fittipaldi and Ayrton Senna in 1989 and 1993 for example, but never on the same day. Hill and Clark won them on the same weekend but again, different days – May 30 and 31 1965. Oh, and Scotland and England don’t count, Scotland never has been, and never will be, English. So there. Nyahhhh (and raspberry like noises)

  But first – an update. HAS MAX STACKED TODAY? …..YES….After nurfing Stroll’s Williams at the end of a safety car period in Spain Max Verstappen made it eleven incidents (spins. collisions and crashes) in six races so far this year when he comprehensively stuffed the Red Rag into the barriers exiting the swimming pool section during third practice. The resulting damage meant a new gearbox was required and that he would not take part in qualifying. Last on the grid. Zero hope of a good result at Monaco. When will he ever learn?


  In complete contrast, team-mate Daniel Ricciardo was in complete control for the entire weekend. It doesn’t much more dominant than this; Practice 1 – 1st, Practice 2 – 1st, Practice 3 – 1st, Qualifying 1 – 1st, Qualifying 2 – 1st, Qualifying 3 – 1st, Race – 1st, all 78 laps – 1st.  And the last 50 of those laps were with an MGU-K (motor generating unit – kinetic) that had gone on the fritz on lap 28. For those wot don’t know, a rooted MGU-K means you have no electrical power supplied to the battery from the turbo. That is knocking about 160 bhp off you maximum engine power at the end of the straights meaning his Red Bull had about as much grunt as the McLaren Honda of 3 years ago. It also means you have no electrical assistance to the rear brakes through the brake by wire system and the tiddley little discs overheat like all buggery and usually expire. A bit like Leclerc’s front ones did, much to Hartley’s chagrin. So, with sod all rear brakes, sod all engine power and using only six of the eight gears available, Danny boy, who by his own accounts had lost about two and a half seconds a lap in performance, held off the attentions of Vettel and Hamilton for 50 laps. OK this is Monaco and the other two had chewed their front tyres early in their second stints, but………BUT this was the sort of performance under extremis that should have just doubled his asking price for whatever contract he signs for 2019 and beyond.


  Max at least put his carambolage in the locker for the race and put in a fine drive through to ninth place, just 1.7 seconds behind Ocon in sixth. As just about everyone else finished where they started it was possibly Pierre Gasly in the Toro Rosso who put in the second best drive of the race. Even though the power deficit that the Honda engine still has doesn’t mean as much at Monaco as any other race it was still an outstanding effort to make the top 10 on the grid and then to drive through to seventh at the finish, less than a second behind Ocon while holding off Hulkenberg and Verstappen.


  As usual this was not the most exciting, in the way of wheel to wheel racing, Grand Prix of the year, but oh boy, was it tense over those last 50 laps, not knowing if the Red Rag would hang in there and if Ricciardo would get his just reward after the disappointment of 2016.


  For full results go to; http://www.mmmsport.com.au/index.php/the-database/formula-1-races/2010-2019/2018-formula-1


Meanwhile, over the pond, the other big race of the year was getting underway. For the first 50 odd laps, pole-sitter Ed Carpenter looked the man most likely, but as the race wore on some of the others got faster while Ed, well didn’t. It’s probably no surprise that those who got faster were from teams like Penske, Ganassi and Andretti Motorsport. At about the halfway point, after a series of caution periods caused by accidents to James Davison, Takuma Sato, Ed Jones and Danica Patrick, Will Power took a lead he would only relinquish during differing pit-stop strategies. Power had been running in the top six all race before claiming the lead when crowd favourite, Tony Kanaan, had to pit with a puncture. Power then held off challenges from Carpenter, Dixon and Rossi before another series of late accidents to Bourdais, Castroneves, Karam and Kanaan scrambled the top positions with 13 laps to go. Hoping their fuel would last, Oriol Servia led from Jack Harvey, Stefan Wilson with both Power and Carpenter fully fuelled when the green flag flew again just 8 laps from home. Servia blew the restart and Wilson then led from Harvey and Power. It would have been a lovely story if Wilson could have won just his 2nd Indy 500. Stefan is the younger brother of Justin Wilson who was killed in an accident at Pocono a few years ago and runs at the Indy 500 in a spare car supplied by Andretti Motorsport born out of respect for Justin. It was not to be however, and with just 4 laps to go both Wilson and Harvey had to pit for fuel handing the lead, and a deserved win, to Will Power.


  And so ended what is possibly Australia’s greatest day in motorsport. Two hugely popular winners of the two biggest open wheel races of the year. And although Adrian Newey didn’t look too keen on the “shuey”, and the Indy Queen looking a tad surprised after being accidently doused with milk, the partying began in earnest. Gotta stop the boys tearing up though, bit of a dent for our macho image. Although I will admit to a moist eye or two…..


Sam Snape








  Yes he has…….


  Back in 2015 there was a funny (but harsh) little site, Has Pastor Crashed Today, taking the piss at the frequency of accidents involving the rapid Venezuelan Pastor Maldonado. It would seem that after the first four races of 2018 a new site may need to be created for Max Verstappen. Consider his record in 2018 so far; Australia – spun and damaged the car in the race, Bahrain – crashed in first practice and collided with Hamilton in the race, China – Spun trying to pass Hamilton and collided with Vettel in the race and finally Baku – crashed in first practice and collided with Ricciardo on no less than three occasions during the race. As all of these incidents have been his fault methinks it is time for Mr Horner to take Max into his office, bend him over the table and give his botty a taste of the birch.Has Max stacked today?


  Unfortunately history tells us that no such damned fine thrashing will take place. For those of a certain age, imagine the “froth job” that Max would have gotten from Ken Tyrrell. Or the bollocking from Messrs Williams and Head. Christian Horner appears to have been unwilling, or unable, to chastise his recalcitrant stars in the past, think Vettel crashing into Webber in Turkey or ignoring team orders in Malaysia. A pity really, because a slightly chastened and wiser Max would end up being a far better race driver (not that he is too bad at present) and that could bring on an exciting new era in the sport. 


  Allow me to fantasize for a moment. Just say the new regs in 2021 work as planned and not only are the cars more passable, but the engines are more evenly matched. Then put Max and Gasly in a Red Bull Honda/VW/Aston Martin, Ricciardo and Leclerc in the Ferraris, Ocon and Bottas or perhaps George Russell in the Mercs, Vandoorne and Lando Norris in the McLaren, Sainz and an aging but still rapid Hulkenberg at Renault and oooohh I’m getting a woody. Then toss in a hopefully re-invigorated Williams with someone quick, a Sauber making the most of its Alfa Romeo connections, and Force India, Toro Rosso and Haas still punching well above their weight and what fun we could have. Then again, a works Trabant may enter Maldonado and totally dominate the decade. But….


  One has to feel for Valtteri after this race. For the first time this year the Silver Slings got their strategy spot on and Bottas dominated the second half of the race. Even the Ricciardo/Verstappen safety car worked in his favour. Everything was finally going right. Valtteri made an excellent restart which forced Vettel to lock up and head down the turn 1 escape road so with just three laps to go he was leading from his team-mate who was not a threat and the recovering Raikkonen. Perez had even gotten past Vettel. Fastest lap had been set. Then a small piece of debris left on the main straight tore through his right rear tyre and his dream run limped on for two more corners. 14th and last place was a cruel result.


  Third place for Perez however was an excellent result, especially considering he was down in 15th place early in the race. This was the first podium for Force India since 2016 when, oddly enough Perez came third in Baku. It was the first podium for any team apart from Mercedes, Ferrari and Red Bull since Stroll’s Williams took third at Baku last year. See a pattern here anyone? Fifth was probably disappointing for Sainz in the Renault who was right on the early pace and able to pass both Red Bulls. Then Renault bollocks their strategy and left him out too long on the ultra-soft tyres and he lost nine places in the two laps around his pit-stop. Although that would have only been seventh had not the Red Bulls mangled each other. Also benefiting from that mangle was Charles Leclerc in the Sauber who pulled off an unlikely, but well deserved, sixth place to score his first championship points. He was outperforming the car all weekend, qualifying 14th and running comfortably in the points all day.A blow-out buggered Bottas


  King Fernando seems to have also been setting a pattern. Qualify 13th and finish 7th. Only in Australia this year has this not been his lot in the McLaren. Still, a vast improvement from last year, long way to go though. Giving Williams some hope in what has been a bad year so far, Stroll finally scored some points in eighth after both cars qualified well in 11th and 12th. Despite the “pay-driver” derision that has been heaped upon Sergey Sirotkin, his qualifying performances in the Williams have been well on the pace of his team-mate so far this year. Whether this is because he is much better than many had given him credit for or Stroll is just no better than a “pay-driver” I guess only time will tell. I’m leaning towards the former. Also scoring his first championship points was Brendon Hartley who nicked the final point for 10th place after starting on the last row of the grid. He suffered a disastrous qualifying which saw him not set a time and almost kill his team-mate, Pierre Gasly. In what was frighteningly similar to the fatal accident that befell Gilles Villeneuve on that horrible day in 1982, Brendon was travelling slowly, having picked up a puncture while Gasly was closing at a vast rate on his final qualifying lap. Just as Hartley started to pull to the left Gasly jinked that way thinking that was where the gap was. Seeing that, Hartley abruptly pulled to the right, just as Gasly did exactly the same thing. Fortunately there was enough room and Gasly managed to just miss Brendon, by inches if that, and avoid what would have been an enormous accident. Both boys and millions of viewers can thank their lucky stars that the only result was a trip down the escape road for Gasly.


Sam Snape




For full results go to; http://www.mmmsport.com.au/index.php/the-database/formula-1-races/2010-2019/2018-formula-1           



UglyPrettyUglyPrettyEven with the aeroscreen the Indycar is way prettier 

  You know you’re getting old when you begin sentences with “I remember when…..”. Like, for example, I remember when F1 cars looked exciting and pretty. Or, I remember when you could actually see a driver in a F1 car. For the first of these examples though, that memory is fading, bit by bit, with every passing year. As I perused the images of this year’s challengers the only positive that flitted about my synapses was that the McLaren was a nice shade of orange. Apart from that they are all pretty, well, bloody ugly. And it’s not just the hideous halo that now completely obscures any vision of the driver at work. It’s all of those horrible appendages that have sprouted like some rampant sexually transmitted fungus. And this got me thinking. It could well be almost a quarter of a century since I saw a F1 car that made me think, “Damn that looks good”. And yeah, that makes me feel old………


 It really all started with the arrival of the barge boards on the McLaren in 1993. Sure there were some rear wings in the mid eighties that more resembled barn doors than aero devices but they didn’t last long and even when they were about the cars still looked pointy, sleek, fast and sexy. Perhaps the last one I thought was really pretty was the 1991 Jordan. The last one I can think of that I thought looked innovative was the Tyrrell 019 with the raised nose and anhedral front wings. Since then they have all had their lines mangled up with barge boards, turning vanes, X-wings, T-wings, front wings that resemble cheese graters and a multitude of other ghastly additions that appear to be dangly, flappy genital protuberances. Lets face it, these things are just horrible to look at. And to really rub it in, all this crap just makes the racing worse. I mean, you can’t even pass with the DRS any more.


  When I fell in love with F1 it was at first sight with the Ferrari 312T. The swoopy, curvy lines, the chrome wings, huge fat rear slicks and the tall white airbox just gave that eleven year old a woody. Then the beautiful sleek simplicity of the Lotus 79 took away your breath in ’78. The “wingless wonders” of 1979 (that didn’t last long as they didn’t work), the stunning Williams, Renaults, Ligiers and Brabhams of the early ‘80s which were joined by the oddities that tried a different variant to the ground effect theme. Think the Arrows A2 or the Fittipaldi F6. Both woefully unsuccessful but great to look at, because they were so different. On top of which you could still actually see the drivers at work. What is there now for a young boy (or girl) to get excited about? You can’t see the driver and the car is as about as enticing as an industrial meat grinder.


  When Liberty gave Bernie the boot I had high hopes that F1 might just finally head back in the right direction. Since then six changes have been made to the sport, and not one of them has made it better. OK not all of them were Libertys call but I’m pretty sure if they had put their foot down there might have been a different decision. Firstly, the biggie of the day. The bloody halo. Yeah it was an FIA safety decision regarding head protection but let’s get things into a little perspective. The last time a F1 driver died of a head injury that the halo might have prevented was when Tom Pryce got hit with a fire extinguisher as he obliterated an errant marshal at Kyalami in 1977. Yeah – 1977. That was 40, I repeat, 40 years ago. It wouldn’t have helped poor Jules Bianchi just as it wouldn’t have helped Maria de Vilotta. The halo won’t help if you drive under a twenty ton tractor or truck. It wouldn’t have helped Massa either as the spring that injured him at least hit his helmet. The halo could just as easily divert that down into the unprotected chest or neck area with much worse consequences. People mention both Henry Surtees and Justin Wilson. Yes it may have saved Henry Surtees but he was in a junior category and most junior categories will not be getting any upgraded head protection for quite a while. It might have saved Justin Wilson but Indycar have already decided that they will not be using the halo but have had series sponsor PPG (who manufacture F16 cockpit canopies amongst other things) to produce a clear and unobtrusive high windscreen they will be used for their head protection. And put it on a car that looks 1000 times nicer than the current F1 fuglies. F1 looked at a windscreen. Herr Vettel did 1 lap (yep – 1) and claimed it made him feel ill. They didn’t try any other driver (although Red Bull gave their own version a run without too many issues) or any further lappery. No going back to the supplier for possible modification, no further trials, just 1 lap by 1 driver and the halo was foist upon us.


  Second decision. Lets make the cars five seconds a lap faster. Sounds OK. By increasing the wing generated downforce and thereby cornering speed. Sounds bloody disastrous. The sport had been trying for years to increase the ability of the cars to run closely through corners to increase the amount of overtaking and “improve the show”. Hence the DRS. In one fell swoop all this was destroyed and last year saw the return to very processional running with no overtaking at many races. By the way, bookending the year with the two worst tracks for overtaking is possibly not the best way forward. Albert Park and Abu Dhabi have less passing moves between them than the Hungaroring, eek.


  Third decision. Lets reduce the number of engines available through the year to 3 per car. Oh great, more grid penalties on the way then. More confusion, less understanding by the fans and therefore probably less fans watching. What the hell is going to happen the day that everyone has to start at the back of the grid or from the pit lane due to penalties?


  Fourth decision. Lets hop on the politically correct train wreck and ban the “grid girls”. Not that they are girls. They are women who are in the modelling profession and have just been done out of a job. It wasn’t as if they were being paraded about in skimpy bikinis being groped and drooled over. In almost all countries these days they wore dresses and were treated with professional respect, they were after all, doing a job. Now we have grid kids, what next, podium toddlers and banning champagne?


  Fifth decision. Move the European race times to a later start time by 1 hour and 10 minutes. Possibly good for those watching on TV in Europe. If they can afford the pay TV fee because they won’t be seeing it on free to air. Not only does this go against the safety provisions brought in after the Bianchi accident that there must be a 4 hour time window of bright daylight after the supposed race finish time in case there is a delay of any sort. But what about all those TV viewers in the rest of the world? The audience in the Asia/Pacific area for example, is not insubstantial. But now the European races will not begin until almost midnight and be ending well after 2AM on a Monday morning when those viewers will have to get to work. Do they really think that too many fans will bother watching these races live any more? A further fall in viewers brings a further fall in revenues to the TV channels who may reconsider the cost of providing coverage.


  And the really important one, announced with great fanfare in Abu Dhabi. Lets change the logo. Who fucking cares. We don’t fork out money to go to the race or plonk ourselves down in front of the Pay-TV to watch a logo. And the only result of a logo change is a reduction of brand recognition.  


  So that’s my old age rant for the week. I seem to be comfortably settling in to a new role as a grumpy old man. I may even become a curmudgeon.


Sam Snape






A REALLY bad decision  Unlike many commentators who have bellowed their dubious umbrage, I say bloody well done to the stewards in Austin. Handing Max a penalty that dropped him back behind Raikkonen was exactly what was required for Verstappen was not on the circuit at all when he passed Kimi on the final lap. Let’s understand the rule. After all it is really rather simple. You cannot leave the defined track and gain a lasting advantage. Not too hard to understand. Did Max leave the defined track? Yes. Did Max gain a lasting advantage? Yes. Therefore the rules were broken and the pass was disallowed as it should have been.


  For all the cretins howling in protest I ask this. If it had been Maradona using his hand to score a goal would you have said that it was OK because it was an aggressive move? Oh that’s right, we already know the answer to that one. Would it be fine for a goal to stand when the player was blatantly offside? Would it be acceptable today for a batsman to be given out to an enormous no-ball? How many fans scream with outrage when a try is scored from a forward pass or the player has stepped into touch. How did McEnroe react when he lost a point to a ball that was out of bounds? “You can’t be serious” Which is just what I say to all those, including Max, who have complained about the decision handed down by the officials in Texas. You simply cannot have it both ways. You cannot complain about referees making incorrect calls, most of which are split second, on the field judgements, and then bitch and vilify the referee when he makes the right call after viewing conclusive video evidence.


  As for the comments by those who really should know better, pull yer head back in guys. Niki Lauda’s comments are usually well worth heading as he doesn’t often speak bullshit, but the drivel he came out with that this “was the worst decision ever” by the stewards and that drivers should be able to drive on any surface they want because there shouldn’t be any track limits is incomprehensible. According to that theory a driver could just do donuts over the start finish line and win the race. No one would have to ever need to actually go through any of those wonderful curves at Austin, ah just straight line the lot of them, it’s OK. Bugger Eau Rouge, just drive back through the paddock and rejoin the track near the pit entry. Sorry Niki, the white lines define the track and as per the rules you are supposed to stay on it. As for it being the worst decision ever? Good Grief Charlie Brown.


  What about not slapping Vettel with any sort of real sanction for his appalling road rage in Baku? How about banning cars that were within the rules as written, such as the Lotus 88? What about Moseley fining McLaren $100,000,000 (yes all those zeros are correct) for bring the sport into disrepute after if was given some technical info about Ferrari? And then Moseley not copping any sanction after his little bout with the spanky girl in dubious attire? It does occur to me that the worst decisions in our sport were those that were not made. Not stripping Senna of the 1990 championship after he deliberately crashed into Prost at Suzuka, and don’t try to argue about it, Senna later admitted that it was deliberate. Not giving Schumacher any meaningful penalty when he tried to win the 1997 championship with a similar ploy against Jacques Villeneuve at Jerez. No race bans, no points stripped, just having his second place in the championship deleted. Talk about getting slapped on the wrist with a wet haddock. All that of course dates back to the day that Senna swerved across the track at Estoril almost forcing Prost, his team-mate at the time, into the pit wall. Had a decent penalty been handed down that day we wouldn’t have had the continuation of the unpunished thuggish behaviour that we have seen through Schumacher to Vettel being let off after causing the start-line accident in Singapore. Disallowing an illegal overtake to stand, sorry Niki, not even close to the worst decision ever.


  Hell, not even a bad one.


Sam Snape